One mid-life crisis please.

Yes sir, what would you like to order this afternoon?
Ah yes, could I have one mid-life crisis please?
Sure, would you like that in large, medium or small?
Hmmm, I think I’ll have the medium. I might not be able to get through the large one today. (Chuckles to self)
Certainly. And would you like anything else with that?
Ah yes, do you have any failed marriages followed by a painful divorce?
I’m really sorry sir, we just ran out of failed marriages followed by a painful divorce this morning.
Gosh, must be popular. You’ve been out all week! I guess they are quite tempting.
Yes, everyone seems to be after a failed marriage followed by painful divorce these days. How about something from the side menu?
Ah shucks. Well, could you hook me up with a psychotic breakdown and a small serving of impotence. Actually, make it a large serving of impotence. I think my appetite just kicked in!
Ok sir, that’s one medium sized mid life crisis, one psychotic breakdown and a large serving of impotence.
That’s right. Thanks.
OK, please take a seat and I’ll bring your order over when you are ready.
Thank you kindly. Umm, there aren’t any seats here.
Ah that’s right, I forgot we don’t have any seats. Just wait in your overpriced 2-seater sports car with the ‘I have a small dick and I’m compensating exhaust pipe’ and I’ll be right there!